NOT HITTING BACK AND OTHER LESSONS

North Texas' own Bob Ray Sanders, columnist for the Fort Worth Star-Telegram:

Many were surprised at my answers, and as I gave them examples of my own battles with Jim Crow, I tried to tell them how important it was to have had support from many people who encouraged me to achieve in spite of him.

I also wanted them to understand the significance of nonviolent protest and how those of us who adhered to that philosophy had to be prepared to go to jail for our beliefs and to resist retaliating against those who hurled stones and epithets at us.

At one point an African-American student asked, "If someone hauled off and slapped you, you wouldn't hit him back?"

I asked him to stand and repeat the question to the group, as I thought carefully how I should reply.

"No, I wouldn't," I said, "especially not if I were involved in a nonviolent protest."

Explaining that in some cases one may be forced to defend himself or herself, I re-emphasized that participants in the civil-rights movement had to learn to refrain from fighting back. They had to take whatever was dished out -- literally, sometimes having drinks and food poured over their heads as they sat at lunch counters waiting to be served.

Had they fought back, I said, they would have set the movement back.

"I would hit them back," the student said bluntly.

"You would?"

"Yeah, I would hit them back," he repeated.

I was taught, I told him and his classmates, that if you fought every time someone called you a name or wanted to fight you, all you would be doing is fighting. And if you were fighting all the time, there would be no time for you to achieve -- to accomplish those goals you set for yourselves.

The questioner still had a puzzled look on his face.

"Just do this for me," I said, as I prepared to take another question. "Just think about it."

In this (I hope) short-lived era where hitting back is purported to show "spine" and "strong leadership," there are still some who have their eye on the big picture and not immediate gratification of the Revenge Factor...